Marriage is a beautiful thing when two people really love each other. It takes patience, trust and lots of love to hold your marriage together along with respect and appreciation. The list can go on and on when it comes to the factors that keep a marriage strong but nobody really talks about those little things that create a huge pile of differences between two people that lead to divorce. There are hundreds of couples who had fairytale love stories before they got married and seemed inseparable. Fast forward two years and they just don’t seem to get along anymore. Let’s look at some of the reasons why this happens and how you can keep your marriage from falling apart.
1. Communication Gap
If you want to live a healthy married life, you must communicate with your partner. By communicating I don’t mean just the usual small talk but communicate deeply with your partner. Ask them how their day was and actually mean it. Show them that you are concerned about the way they are behaving and want to help. Many partners fail at this because they think their significant other could be going through a tough time and all they want is someone to give them space. That’s when the clashes usually happen and the couple ends up distanced from each other.
2. You Two Were Leading Separate Lives
It’s normal that life can get busy at times. You are human and it’s not possible to always make time for everything. This is when your partner probably starts getting ignored and longs for that affection there once was. Therefore, your partner starts filling their time with other activities and you two start slowly drifting apart.
3. Your Emotional Connection Was Not Being Nurtured
A physical relationship with your spouse is necessary but having a strong emotional connection is what will get you through those tough times. Interacting physically is not what will save your marriage. It is obvious that when you two lack the emotional time and understanding for each other, there’s really no room left for such activity. This is one of the reasons partners cheat and they end up getting divorced.
“Little drops of water make the mighty ocean.” There are many things that can be related to this and one of them is humiliation. You don’t even realize you are humiliating your partner either because of their choice of clothes, the way they walk, or you being ashamed to take them out because they lack confidence. A good spouse will still try to live up to your expectations but even the nicest people have their limits. At one point, they will get angry and stand up for themselves. This is the time when you should be scared because they will realize that they deserve someone who loves them for who they are.
5. You Disrespected Them A Lot
Remember that your partner is not blind; they can see when you look at someone from the corner of your eyes while admiring their beauty. If this happens once or twice, fine, but regular disrespect can damage your relationship and make it fall just like a healthy, green tree would.
6. The Other Person Was Burdened With The Workload
Another important and rarely known reason for a couple to part ways is when a partner feels unappreciated and used for their efforts. You can’t expect them to be happy when you spend your whole day out having a good time while they are stuck at home with your little one who can give them a hard time. Overloading your partner with all chores while you sit back and relax is unfair and they could easily be dragged away because of this.
7. There Was Extreme Criticism
It is okay to give your partner the space they need when they are trying to do something creative but constantly failing. Instead of criticizing and discouraging them you could show some appreciation with kind words and a peck on their cheek. This will show them that you actually care and want to see them successful. Over criticizing can kill your relationship a lot quicker than you think.
8. You Were Unsupportive
Another reason why people start getting bored and lose interest in their marriage is the lack of support from their other half. For instance, they were probably super excited to tell you about a new job opportunity they just got and you responded by saying mean phrases like, “who would hire you?” Don’t do that. Just don’t. This can hurt your partner a lot more than you think and make them want to reconsider their decision to marry you.
9. You Praise and Admire Others In Their Presence
This is one of the worst things you could do to your partner. Often we do it unintentionally, just mentioning a casual appreciation of what another person is doing and how they are behaving with their own partner. Your husband or wife could take it lightly at first but at the end of the day, your words will be the reason they can’t sleep at night.
10. You Blame Them For Everything
There is an old proverb that says, “One hand cannot clap.” Blaming your partner constantly for things that you might have done wrong can be dangerous. You can push your partner away instantly by doing this so the best thing to do is just to be patient and agree with them. Later on, if they were wrong you can explain it to them when both of you have calmed down.